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God was a jerk until Noah made him a barbeque. What was his secret recipe?

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Old 11-05-2007, 09:17 AM
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Default God was a jerk until Noah made him a barbeque. What was his secret recipe?

I've notived that in the Bible, God doesn't really start to lighten up until Noah cooks him a barbeque. What was Noahs secret recipe? What was the meat?

[8:20 And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.]

[8:21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man's sake; for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.]

(Thanks for not smiting all of us, touchy jerk)
Obviously, he was being a jerk if the thing that made him decide not to smote all our butts again was the savoury smell of Noahs burnt offering BBQ.

He was like, "Mmmmm, whats that smell? Maybe this people can be of some use after all...."

Jerk.
Ok. Perhaps "Jerk" was to harsh. But he was pretty god damn grumpy to say the least. You've got to admit it...
I fail to see how I'm beain abusive. I quoted the bible and parahrased it as a question. Noah made a BBQ, then God was a little nicer. Just an observation...
ecazaly: How can I call him a jerk?
I don't know, but it's really easy.
Does it say, "Thou shall not be a jerk", someplace? I love everybody, idiots.
beech driver: BAH! "A repentant heart that made a burnt offering to God is described as a sweet aroma because God loves it when people repent and declare their need of Him."

That's not what it say, it says he smelled the meat and had second thoughts about smoting us all again, because of Noahs super savoury BBQ!!!
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Old 11-05-2007, 09:24 AM
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You are funny. I am not bothering to read all of the other answers.

Don't worry. All that stuff is just to create a metaphor (not that it didn't happen) for understanding what happened at the cross.

How the symbol of repenting with sacrafice for sins weighs against the symbol of Jesus being the sacrafice. (so how much more is God pleased etc)

Yes, He was made out to be a jerk in the good book. It has its purpose. But you really don't have to worry about it.

God is in you - so easy on beating yourself up!
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Old 11-05-2007, 09:27 AM
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God a jerk? Smart...
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Old 11-05-2007, 09:28 AM
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Must have been jerky
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